Yeah — But HOW? From My Heart
I’ve been hearing this question a lot over the last couple of years:
“OK Ken – I understand the importance of surrender – but HOW do I actually do it??!”
As with so many other things, there is no single way to do something.
However, I can share my process for surrender with you.
Be forewarned – it’s not very refined or beautiful.
Whereas Divine Connecting Breath or Beneath the Sand are practices that have come in Divine download to me (the beauty of these practices continues to be revealed), surrender is something I’ve learned through trial and error (AKA beating my head against the wall repeatedly). It’s also a process that had lead to extraordinary growth and liberation.
All because I finally realized that I don’t know …
I’ve written before about the various phases of surrender (I believe I’ve referenced 5 stages of surrender).
While the practice of proactive surrender is extraordinary, first we must learn to walk.
First we must learn to surrender where there is resistance.
Sometimes it’s really easy for me to be vulnerable with you.
This week that’s not the case.
Let my discomfort in sharing be instructive for you: when we are uncomfortable we’re getting on towards the good stuff.
When I face something that I’m running into serious resistance around it’s typically because of an ego attachment.
I want something to be a certain way. But that way isn’t happening.
For example, last July I entered a writing contest with my first book.
The top prize was guaranteed representation by Bill Gladstone (the agent for Eckhart Tolle and other very well known spiritual teachers).
I was convinced I would win the top prize. (as aside, look at my ego go – slow down there big guy!)
When the prizes were announced I did not win representation with Bill.
He did select my book for publishing through his e-book company.
And he awarded me a chapter in an upcoming book that he and Jack Canfield are working on.
Not bad, right?
But my response wasn’t so gracious or excited.
I was disappointed that I didn’t win.
Once I understand what’s causing my upset (sometimes it’s obvious, sometimes it’s more hidden), I address it head on.
The first step of surrender is accepting that my imagined worst case scenario is real.
This past October after hearing the news from the writing contest I began to realize that the thing that I was most upset about was a fear.
I was afraid that my writing was total crap. No value to anyone. Ever.
(Notice that the fear is completely EGO based – and focused on external validation)
As quickly as possible (it may have taken me a couple of days – though I’d like to tell you it took a couple of minutes or an hour, LOL!) I accepted this fear as reality:
“My writing is total crap – and will never have any value to anyone.”
Curiously enough, this liberated me to begin wondering:
“What value (if any) does my writing have?”
Quick answer: “it has value to me!”
“The writing I’ve done on my book has given me a huge amount of clarity around the process of spiritual mastery – around what I do, how I can help people – and I have lots of evidence of this (private sessions, folks enrolled in Foundations of Spiritual Mastery I (which was a direct result of the writing), etc.).”
If my writing is total crap to everyone else – but it has value for me, then I can write for me.
If Bill is never my agent, that’s OK – I’m writing for me – and not for anyone else.
If I’m never published that’s OK – I’m writing for the clarity that I gain.
Once I accept the worst case scenario, I can surrender completely to the Divine.
I’ve already imagined the worst. I’ve accepted it. Whatever God has in store for me is fine – even if it’s the worst case.
I’m off the hook. It’s not up to me to make it happen.
I have remembered who I am: a conduit for the Divine.
God I surrender my book to you.
Whatever is meant to happen with this project I leave it all to you, and I accept everything exactly as it is.
Thank you for the gifts you have given me, and for the inspiration to write this book and the clarity that continues to come to me through writing.
God I surrender my entire life to you. I recognize that I am a conduit through which your Divine grace flows.
I’m getting out of the way so you can do your thing.
It’s the same process with a healing session.
If I think I know what’s going on then I need to solve it.
Yet there is nothing to solve.
And I know nothing.
Other than to get out of the way, and witness.
When we excavate down to the essence of things, we always find simplicity.
Always distilling and revealing itself.
Around another corner we see things in a new light, and the epiphany strikes.
Whereas a complicated solution feeds our ego, the truth disarms us with a simple presence that can’t be denied.
Before I could surrender, I confronted the truth that I was the source of all the pain and suffering in my life.
I was creating the nightmare.
My efforts to control were creating a barrier that was holding away Divine grace.
Coming to this conclusion was devastating.
Before this conclusion I always had the answer and I knew a better way.
After this conclusion I came to understand: When I remember that I am a servant, an instrument of the Divine – I experience my life in deep resonance.
When I forget this, resistance pops up everywhere until I once again remember.
Write the book that wants to be written through me (if indeed one wants to be written).
Leave me nuggets of clarity along the way if you will.
Yet even now I surrender everything completely.
Each time I exhale I let go completely of everything I think I know or understand.
Breathing in I receive anew.
Letting my breath go, I surrender once again.
That’s it for this week … From My Heart.
Thanks for reading, and for including me in your life. It’s an honor to walk the journey alongside you.
Ken W Stone
“The Soul Archaeologist”
Experience the Divine Within